posted by Mel
Things are great- really. My belly is getting bigger. We listen to the baby almost every day, and the heartbeat is still there and strong. Nausea has subsided a bit, and I am enjoying pregnancy– well, kind of. Actually, I mostly want it over because we have been waiting on this baby for what seems like forever. The other day I commented to Vanessa that the first trimester had been god-awful long, and she said, “Well, yeah– it lasted two and and a half years.”
She’s right. It feels like my body has belonged to this baby for more than 2 years already. It’s not like I’m ready to eject it or anything. I would just like to finally meet it.
On the other hand, I am freaking out because I know next to nothing about what happens next. I have spent so much time focused on how to get here I could teach classes on infertility– what the possible roots are, what the different meds do, how to administer the drugs, how to badger sperm banks and nurses into giving you the information you need, how to talk to your insurance company about it. But what do I know about how to pick out a bassinet, choose a breast pump, decide on a diapering system, or properly install a carseat? Bupkiss. We are making zero progress on the baby prep front. Every time I try to research anything, I flip the f out. Don’t even get me started on breastfeeding or child birthing methods. A panic attack for another day. For now we walk into a baby store, and I have to leave within 10 minutes. It is too. much. stuff. Too many moving parts. Too many accessories. Too much plastic. Which of this shit do we need, and where the hell are we going to put it all in our tiny (by Midwestern standards) bungalo?
When we first began our baby-begetting discussions, way before we started trying for one, Vanessa had me convinced that babies don’t take up much room at all– that, if we wanted to, we could even manage one in that first 700 sq ft one-bedroom apartment we shared. We’d just slide it into a dresser drawer or something. I know there has to be a middle-ground between the baby drawer and the BABY ACCESSORIZE YOUR WHOLE HOUSE approach BRU would like us to take. I wish that middle-ground was easier to find. It sure isn’t presenting itself at retailers or in the pg magazines I’m picking up at the OB’s office.
I know some of our readers are making this work already in spaces much smaller than our approximately 10 ft by 12 ft bedroom set aside for the nursery. Big city apartment dwellers, I’m looking at you. I’m tired of looking at checklists with 150 things on them. What are the top 10 things we need to buy to be ready for this baby?