OK. Freak out, which I normally would not post to the blog, but I’m home from work right now and Vanessa is traveling and unreachable, so there is no one to have the freak out with. Apologize in the advance for the liberal use of ALL CAPS.
Just got off the phone with our fertility clinic’s financial counselor, who I was totally not expecting to hear from for a while because of the whole not cycling till December thing. Well it turns out that, even though Vanessa is on my insurance– still on my insurance even though it’s very expensive for us to do it this way BECAUSE my insurance pays for bloodwork and ultrasounds and meds associated with infertility even though it doesn’t pay for the procedures or surgery center fees– her diagnosis will now be egg donor not infertility like mine, as though she is just some anonymous party even though she’s my PARTNER and really my infertility is her infertility. And this means insurance will probably NOT pay for all of those things it paid for on my IVF cycle.
If we didn’t have a closet still full of unused IVF drugs leftover from the last cycle, this would mean a minimum of $5000 more added to our bill– bringing our grand total for another IVF cycle up to somewhere in the neighborhood of $12,000 (would be 13K if they had us down for ICSI this time, which they might still decide we need to do). Last time we paid about $8K and that was WITH some insurance coverage. Our closet supply will mostly get us through her cycle but only if she stimulates really well. If they have to pump more drugs into her than they had to pump into me, we might be a little fucked.
As it is, even if we’re OK on drugs, our total for this next IVF cycle is automatically 8K, realistically 9K with ICSI. We’re a little better on money right now because Vanessa’s income is more predictable since she has taken a full-time consulting gig. The reason I was really breathing easy up till now is because we were counting on selling my car, which should still happen– hope it’s really soon.
And to top it all off, I am just kind of pissed that an extra $5K is coming out of my paycheck this year (for post-tax domestic partner benefits) and we could have had Vanessa on her workplace’s insurance for much much cheaper had we realized this was going to be a problem.
Screwed and screwed and screwed again. Welcome to life as an infertile in a relationship unrecognized by the state.