Monthly Archives: August 2007

Beautiful Nursery Art

Lotus Baby– shown by permission of the artist

Vanessa and I discovered this woman‘s work at a recent Indianapolis art fair. We bought a print of When Dinosaurs Roamed the West (you can see it on the posters page) for our future young’n’s room. She’s going to be at Penrod Art Fair this weekend. If you can’t make it to Penrod, check her out. I think her fanciful fairytale/Judaism-inspired pieces will charm a lot of the folks who read this blog.

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New IVF Protocol

Posted by v.

Our IVF drug protocol arrived in the mail a few days ago, and I’m breathing a huge sigh of relief. Dr. G has me on Follistim and Menopur. Follistim is a lot easier to administer than Bravelle and Menopur. Also, Mel didn’t overstimulate on Follistim the way she did with B & M. I’m looking forward to having a similar experience.

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Filed under Young'n

Best Thai Ever, and it’s on the South Side!

Katie and I tried Thai Spice on County Line Road in Greenwood for the first time last night. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to get to another restaurant in Greenwood again. It is that good. I would go back there again tonight if I didn’t have a commitment that demands I be in Fishers tonight. Damn it. I’m taking Vanessa there this weekend.

One reviewer (see link above) has said that its not vegetarian-friendly. I didn’t find that to be the case. There are lots of veggie options on the menu. Perhaps it’s hard to get truly vegetarian Thai anywhere b/c of the fish sauce  so frequently used. I’m not a vegetarian but often prefer to order that way. The veggie Pad Thai came with beautifully steamed broccoli, carrots, bok choy, bean sprouts, and the most divine lightly fried tofu (also available as an appetizer)– crisp on the outside, spongey on the inside. It reminded me of Indian paneer but without the bad breath problem I always seem to have with goat cheeses (an allergy I think).

If you’re in the Indianapolis area and like Thai food even a little, you have to try it. Thank goodness for another non-chain option on the South side. This will be my Greenwood restaurant of choice from now on.

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Filed under Southside Rocks!

Freak out– w/update

OK. Freak out, which I normally would not post to the blog, but I’m home from work right now and Vanessa is traveling and unreachable, so there is no one to have the freak out with. Apologize in the advance for the liberal use of ALL CAPS.

Just got off the phone with our fertility clinic’s financial counselor, who I was totally not expecting to hear from for a while because of the whole not cycling till December thing. Well it turns out that, even though Vanessa is on my insurance– still on my insurance even though it’s very expensive for us to do it this way BECAUSE my insurance pays for bloodwork and ultrasounds and meds associated with infertility even though it doesn’t pay for the procedures or surgery center fees– her diagnosis will now be egg donor not infertility like mine, as though she is just some anonymous party even though she’s my PARTNER and really my infertility is her infertility. And this means insurance will probably NOT pay for all of those things it paid for on my IVF cycle.

If we didn’t have a closet still full of unused IVF drugs leftover from the last cycle, this would mean a minimum of $5000 more added to our bill– bringing our grand total for another IVF cycle up to somewhere in the neighborhood of $12,000 (would be 13K if they had us down for ICSI this time, which they might still decide we need to do). Last time we paid about $8K and that was WITH some insurance coverage. Our closet supply will mostly get us through her cycle but only if she stimulates really well. If they have to pump more drugs into her than they had to pump into me, we might be a little fucked.

As it is, even if we’re OK on drugs, our total for this next IVF cycle is automatically 8K, realistically 9K with ICSI. We’re a little better on money right now because Vanessa’s income is more predictable since she has taken a full-time consulting gig. The reason I was really breathing easy up till now is because we were counting on selling my car, which should still happen– hope it’s really soon.

And to top it all off, I am just kind of pissed that an extra $5K is coming out of my paycheck this year (for post-tax domestic partner benefits) and we could have had Vanessa on her workplace’s insurance for much much cheaper had we realized this was going to be a problem.

Screwed and screwed and screwed again. Welcome to life as an infertile in a relationship unrecognized by the state.

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Filed under Gettin' Knocked Up, The way the world works

Vanessa’s turn

posted by Melody

We went to the RE yesterday for Vanessa’s first official appointment. It was really more of a consultation about how to manage a donor egg cycle. Technically Vanessa is donating her eggs even though this is most definitely destined to be her child as well as mine. She has to get a cycle day 3 FSH test done. This is in peril because she’s going to be traveling on what will likely be her CD3, but if it doesn’t work out this month, it will work out some time between now and October when I start my drugs for a December retrieval and transfer. Because it will be more than a year from the time I got all my STD testing done (including the infamous and mandatory, according to IN state law for those donating or receiving donor gametes, gonorrhea and chlamydia swab) we’ll both have to be vampirized and swabbed within the next month.

Some time in October I will start Lupron to put me back into menopause while we wait for her next cycle to begin so that we can be sure to cycle together. I will probably be on Lupron for a month or more, but it’s good to be able to make some small sacrifice of comfort in solidarity with what she’ll be doing. Plus if you have to subject yourself to hot flashes, it’s better to do it in sweater weather than the middle of July.

Doing this together makes me feel very close to Vanessa. It also makes me feel a little desperate and out of control. Nurse Lunch Lady cut me just a little when she proclaimed “We don’t have to put you on anything but Lupron this time. Nobody cares if YOU ovulate.” I think she meant that to be comforting, but it sounded more like, “Out of the way so we can get some healthy ovaries in here to do this job right.”

Vanessa’s very matter of fact about the whole thing. She doesn’t seem to need to analyze this to death. She’s seen IVF up close. She knows what to expect. At least right now she’s all about getting this done. No need to talk about it.

Me, I’ve got questions that all seem pretty unanswerable. What the hell is wrong with me? What caused my eggs to go rotten when I’m only 30 years old? Is it something I did? Does it have something to do with the weight I carried around through my early 20s? The rapid pace at which I lost it (no, not gastric bypass for those just joining us)? It doesn’t seem like infertility runs in the family. Who/what do I blame? Vanessa says blame plastic. Blame pesticides. If that’s the case, why me and not most other people? What’s to keep the same thing from happening with Vanessa’s eggs?

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You tell em, Hillary

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West Palm/Delray Beach Meet-up?

posted by Mel

For work reasons I will be in the West Palm Beach/Delray Beach area August 21st and 22nd with nothing to do on the evening of August 21st. I know some fertility bloggers out there are in FL, but I’m not sure where. If you’re close to that area and would like to meet up for dinner, leave a comment, and I will e-mail you.

Also, Rosie and Buffy would like Mama Ness, who is out visiting with family right now, to know that the leftover blueberry pancakes she intended for breakfasts later in the week were just scrumptious. They know you don’t begrudge them a pancake or six, which they scooped off the counter in the minute and a half it took for Mama Mel to go outside to gather some basil for the marinara she’s making this morning.

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Filed under DogBlog, Gettin' Knocked Up