Tested this morning. Not pregnant. I changed my mind– I don’t think I’m getting stuck this month just to confirm what I already know. I’ll take one more pg test tomorrow morning, and if it says what it said this morning then screw it. I’m off the hoo-ha bullets until July. I’ve already started obsessing about the IVF. I have a new job that involves more travel (yay me! btw– new job is a good thing), and I’m trying to screw up the courage to do my own injections, since I probably won’t have Vanessa there to shoot me up.
I thought I was OK with IVF, but this morning I’m really resentful. I’m mad that I have to go through another month or more of hormone treatments, mad that I have to get my ovaries aspirated with a huge f’ing needle, and I’m struggling to believe that it can actually work. That doesn’t mean that I won’t go through with it, but I’m worried about the emotional fall-out if it doesn’t happen.
posted by Mel
I have been out of town for a week. It has been a nice distraction from the TWW. I’d like to continue ignoring the TWW, but I will come out of the fog for just a moment to tell you that I’m pretty sure it’s already over. My temperature dropped this morning– just a little but enough to make me think it’s not happening this month. Besides that, I just feel too damn normal. If my temp’s low tomorrow (13 dpo), I’m not even sure I’m going to test. I’ll just go in for the obligatory blood sucking on Wednesday morning.
It really looks like a needle up the snatch in July, but I’m deferring all wailing and blubbering until Wednesday evening.
I’m pre-approved for a Target credit account. I can save 10% on my $4.00 purchase of cat litter.
We had a very crappy election day here in Marion County yesterday. It was a complete debacle with several hundred volunteers who didn’t show up. That, however, isn’t the cause of the problem. This cluster has been brewing for a long time. It has to do with antiquated processes, a growing city, and a lack of civic responsibility. In short, the system is broken. And no amount of apologizing and name calling is going to fix it.
Should Beth White resign? Uh, no. This isn’t an individual failure. It’s a failure of the entire system. Until the system is reformed, we’re going to have this same experience over and over again.
Saturday, May 12 and Sunday, May 13 at Garfield Park
For more info about the event and performers, see:
Garfield Park Arts Center
posted by Melody
Lots of lesbian TTCers joke that their fertility problem is male factor. Maybe for us it’s actually true.
Apparently high levels of lead in semen are associated with low fertilization rates. The lead can make it difficult for the sperm to bind with the egg. At risk for higher levels of lead include men who are painters, plumbers, and printers. Guess what the guy who’s sperm we’ve been using for nearly a year does for a living. He’s a pressman. Maybe a change of donor will do us some good.
Also, motility decreases by 0.7% each year. Our previous donor was in his 40s at the time of donation. Our new donor is 20.
Won’t it be a kick if we’ve actually been dealing with male factor infertility all this time? It will certainly make me want to kick someone, that is. The counts have always been good, but the count and motility apparently aren’t the only factors in male infertility. Even if count looks good, an older man’s sperm might be weaker, ie. less able to penetrate the egg’s membrane.
Vanessa and I have been discussing what a shame it is that the most fertile years are the years in which one is least prepared to parent. We don’t want our children to feel rushed into parenthood just because those are their most fertile years, so we’re going to seriously consider egg or sperm freezing as college graduation presents. Speaking from experience, I would take that over a car or a laptop any day.
posted by Melody
…this morning, or maybe it only feels that way. We did everything right. Now it’s up to my rubber eggs to decide whether or not they want to cooperate this month. The nurse said the new donor sperm looks fantastic. Sperm doesn’t usually elicit such an enthusiastic response at this RE’s office, so I feel good about that. She also had some interesting things to say about the benefits of using a younger donor, which I’ll need to do some more research on later before I go shooting off at the mouth and getting a load of anxious TTCers’ panties in a bunch about the age of their donors.
I am bl-OAT-ed. Last night was really bad. I was sitting at the dining room table near tears, hot, uncomfortable and frustrated, and trying to troubleshoot my non-functioning sewing machine. Vanessa tried to give me a soothing backrub, and I bit her head off. She had to pull out the big guns to bring me back to my senses, that age-old cure-all: slow-churned mint chocolate chip ice cream. This morning I’m slightly more comfortable than last night. I’m 2 lbs heavier total for the cycle, and I’m drinking loads of water to try to flush out the extra fluid in my abdomen from all the follicles. Traveling for work next week, so I’m hoping that will distract me from worrying during this TWW.
Oh– almost forgot. Please note the new Fertilictionary I’ve added in the sidebar for all you non-TCCers. I will be adding to this frequently.