When We’re With Child

The Star has an interesting article this morning on the blahs of motherhood. About a year ago, Mel and I decided we wanted kids. We decided I should get inseminated because I’m older and, at the time, I was amenable to the idea. The more we researched it, the more I found myself feeling ambivalent. Insemination is not something you should undertake with ambivalence, unless you have money to burn. We don’t, so I backed out.

About six months ago, Mel started pining to have a baby. I was still ambivalent, but Mel had made up her mind. Along for the ride I went. There’ve been many arguments in the past few months. More than once my less-than-enthused glaze over topics as stimulating as ovulation, implantation, and tiger stripes has been called out.

It’s not that I don’t want to have a child. But, I do have reservations, too. I’m concerned about how it’ll change our lives. Neither Mel nor I want to sacrifice our careers to have children. We’re worried about schooling. (Mel’s more worried than I. No, she’s a nut about it.)

Mel and I have a good, strong relationship. We have Rosie and Carrot. We have a bungalow and money in the bank. We have a good life. Will a child make our life better?

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3 Comments

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3 responses to “When We’re With Child

  1. Just so everyone knows, I’m not freaking out over this line of questioning. I have my concerns about having a baby, too. After we got a dog, she was just such a handful that I wondered if we’d made a mistake, and that made me question whether or not we could handle a child. Overall, though, Rosie brings a lot of joy to our lives. A child is going to bring joys to our lives that we can’t even imagine right now– and a lot of hardship, too, I’m sure.

    I think we’re better prepared than most and that it’s a good thing to examine the potential negative consequences of having a baby before the kid is here. Like I’ve told Vanessa, though, I want all that life has to offer, and children are a part of that. That doesn’t mean that we go into it with our eyes closed.

  2. Hi, Vanessa, Mel, long time no talk to!

    You two just need to borrow Adam for a few days to help you settle your nerves. Gabrielle and I should just drop by Indy this fall and plop him on your porch for a visit. That 30 minutes in the Cheesecake Factory last year wasn’t enough! He just had his first birthday, so it is time for some traveling again!

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