Life Stuff

Posted by v

I’m thrilled about all our good baby news. But I thought I’d share some of life’s other stuff that’s going on:

• All our plumbing fixtures started leaking at the same time
• Work really sucks right now
• I’m on my period
• I have bruises in my armpits from my 25 pound backpack
• I dumped used cat litter all over the garage floor (and my foot)
• Some animal ripped a bird apart on our back porch
• One of the cats took a dump on Mel’s Ipod. And it really stinks.

What a day! I think I’ll go look at the u/s pics.

-v

Released

posted by Mel

11 weeks today. I went in for one last scan at the RE’s this morning. Vanessa was traveling, and I decided to go this one alone. I’ve been doing better over the past couple of days at talking myself down from the ledge, telling myself there’s nothing I can do one way or the other, distracting myself with other things. A little humor in the comments last week helped a little. :) I did a pretty good job until I got into the waiting room. Just when I thought I was going to make myself puke, they called me back.

Everything is fine. The minute my uterus swam into view, I took a huge sigh of relief. The sac has gotten much larger. It looked normal, so the RE told the u/s tech not to even bother to measure it. The fetus is actually measuring 1 day ahead of schedule– 4.27 cm. The heartbeat is steady and strong– still 188, which is high, but I can’t find a reason to be worried about it. It would be much worse if it was really slow. I’m betting that I’m just stressing it out with all my adrenaline and stress hormones before an ultrasound. The average fetal heart rate at 11 weeks is 165.

The RE looked on for about 15 seconds and then said “Oh yeah,  you’re out of here. Send us pictures.” They did a quick blood draw to check my progesterone to determine whether I can stop taking supplements, handed me a vinyl Menopur/Bravelle-branded diaper bag and a pregnancy mag, and sent me on my way.

Maybe we’re going to get a baby out of this.

Still not convinced

posted by Mel

After 5 days of waiting for the OB’s office to get back with me about my concerns about the gestational sac, I finally broke down and called them again. When they called back, the nurse had conferenced with the doctor, and neither of them even HAD our GS measurements. They just said the ultrasound looked normal. I, in the meantime, have watched the video anew and have now seen that, at 9 weeks, the sac was measuring just 4 mm larger than the embryo. According to the Internets (and not blinkie shiny naive preggo boards either– mostly abstracts from studies, like this one), a sac that is less than 5 mm larger than the embryo = 80% chance of a miscarriage.

After explaining my worries to the nurse, I get this response– We wouldn’t have even measured the gestational sac if you hadn’t requested it. It looks normal to us– cute, in fact. (CUTE?!) If it’s too small, there’s nothing we can do about it anyway. Get off the Internet, and enjoy your pregnancy.

How the fuck do I do that?

9 Weeks

posted by Mel

We had another ultrasound– this time so that our OB could date the pregnancy (EDD now February 10th). At 9 weeks we could actually see it hopping around in there. It waved its arms and legs and gave us a little booty shake for good measure. Heart rate is roaring along 188 bpm, which seemed a little high to me, but Dr. Google assures me that, though it is a bit above normal range, this is the week where the heartrate is likely higher than it will ever be again. It climbs till week 9 and then begins to settle down.

The ultrasound tech measured the gestational sac because I asked her to, and it’s still measuring a little over a week behind, which still worries me. Will try to wait until the OB has had a chance to have a look before I freak again. The embryo measured 2.27 cm. So now it’s about the size of a grape. We’re in centimeters people.

Three more pics this week. A 9 week ultrasound, an 8 week belly shot in which I show off my pre-existing stretch marks, and a food baby belly shot of Vanessa, who was feeling a bit left out of the family pics.

Now with clearly defined head and body :)

Please do not look too closely.

Reeling

posted by Mel

My little sister is 12 weeks pregnant. 12 weeks.

Two months of trying. No shots. No pills. No worries.

Did I mention she is 12 weeks? She’s due a month before us in case you didn’t get the full significance there.

More Firsts

posted by Mel

Vanessa and I just got back from our first real OB appointment. We love her. We didn’t know her before, and, for some reason, the intake nurse we saw a couple of weeks ago thought she would be a good fit for us.

Now I know why. Katy H, per Vanessa it is like having YOU for an OB– at least attitude-wise. She’s laid-back and funny and maybe even a little nuts. I knew I was going to adore her with just one look at her outfit. Hot pink velour sweater with 3/4-length sleeves, stretched a bit too tight around the mid-section and boobs. Brown cotton capri pants. It was 1980s gym attire– except for the shoes: chunky brown leather sandals. She has personal experience with infertility. Her last child was an IVF baby. So she seems to get the way the mind of an infertile works.

Because V and I are both gold-star lesbians, we got out of a bunch of tests for STDs AND the pap she usually does with new patients. She ordered another ultrasound for next Tuesday; so I can cancel the one I had scheduled with Dr. Pompous for next Friday and wait for our own RE to be back in town to have our graduation appointment with our clinic.

Everything was going great until they had to draw blood. I have notoriously difficult veins, and the blood was coming very slow. I passed out. It isn’t the first time it has happened, but it’s the first time it happened when I wasn’t already a bit dehydrated. I had already had 80 oz of water by then. When I came to, a nurse was holding some kind of ammonia capsule under my nose. They pretty much carried me to an empty exam room and made me lie on my side until my blood pressure came back up. It had dropped to 70/58. Considering that I’d had plenty to eat and drink, one of the nurses said that it was probably just because I’m pregnant. (What happens if you do this in the middle of a delivery? Something new to worry about.) There must have been 5 different people who came back and checked on me. It was the height of embarrassment.

Actually, the real height of embarrassment came about 5 minutes after we finally left the office when Vanessa told me I had passed gas while I was out. I hope she’s lying.

More congrats in order

posted by Mel

Vee and Jay, we couldn’t be more happy for you. You guys have been there with us from the very beginning of our journey. It feels like the universe is righting itself a little bit.

They should rename Cool Water to Stagnant Sewer Water

Eric’s cologne makes me want to vomit.

Actually, it offended my nostrils even pre-pregnancy, but now it brings me close to tears. Any way to say that delicately to a 20-year-old?

And why put on cologne just to go to the skate park?

Now with pics (warning– belly pic)

posted by Mel

Yesterday’s ultrasound with baby measuring at approximately 7 weeks, 3 days. If you look closely, the white dot in the middle of the blob is the heart. I think the 4 peripheral white-ish protrusions might be limbs. The u/s tech is such a doll. She wrote “Hi Momma Vanessa” above it since Vanessa couldn’t be there yesterday.

I am also going to bite the bullet and show you our first belly pic. Vanessa calls this one, “I’m so happy I’m pregnant!” as opposed to the actual first belly pic we took where I was accidentally frowning because I was trying to get the positioning right, and I ended up looking just like Shirley. Vanessa calls that one “I’m so mad I’m pregnant.” I’m definitely not mad. By the way, what you see is pre-existing fat with a side of mega-bloat. The baby is only about the size of a pencil eraser at this point.

I’m still debating the widget. Feels like a jinx. Plus, I have no idea how many weeks pregnant I really am. I’m still confused about it. Do I really go by last menstrual period? Implantation was definitely late, so it’s never going to be accurate for where the baby should be. And I’m afraid to look at it all the time and think the baby is always behind. I’m neurotic enough as it is.

It’s all good

posted by Mel

Will post a pic later, but I wanted to do a quick post to let everyone know that it’s OK. Baby is measuring 7.4 weeks (11.4 mm) and gestational sac is measuring 6.4 weeks (16.8 mm)– within safe range. It grew a mm/day for the past week, which is exactly what it should be doing at this point. The RE eyeballed the heartbeat and called it about 140 bpm and said he doesn’t need to see us again for two weeks. I’m feeling very relieved. My emotional status has gone from just plain Cautious to Cautiously Optimistic. Thanks to Katy H for accompanying me while Vanessa was traveling!